The period after a breakup is the perfect time for a little post-relationship debriefing with trusted friends. It's also a great time for some self-reflection about what you're looking for in a new relationship. This self-reflection often includes reading up on love and relationships to make sure you are wiser and better equipped for relationship success.
When you do talk, Mintz suggests using the sandwich technique: Give him a compliment, tell him your problem, then follow it up with another compliment. Example: "I really love having sex with you, and after we have sex I feel really close and connected. I know you really want to shower, but I really want to cuddle. Is there a compromise that will work for both of us?"
Falling in love is relatively simple. It's staying in love that's the tricky part. Mr. Chapman has identified what he calls the five love languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. Knowing how different people show and express their love is a good first step toward understanding them--and appreciating their loving behaviors.
"Lose your 'type.' People dismiss too many possible matches because they don’t match their checklist they have written for themselves. They are limiting who they meet based on their own judgment. If people become more open to who they are willing to meet they surprise themselves at the different personalities they can be attracted to. The saying “opposites attract” is a known quote for a reason."
One-stop shopping for porn geeks. As if 15,000 reviews of 48 varieties of porn (and space for you to submit your own critiques) weren't enough to keep you busy, this site also has interviews and podcasts with porn stars and directors, a weekly newsletter, and sale alerts. More for guiding your rental fun than providing it, it's way better than the back room at your local video store. Plus, half the pleasure comes from scrolling through the lists for cheesy titles. Our favorite? The Da Vinci Load.
Your man wants to know you appreciate him for who he is and what he brings to the relationship. If you love him, make sure he knows. Keep in mind Dr. John Gottman’s 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interchanges. For every one negative remark you make, try to think of five positive things to say, to counteract the negative effects of a critical word. Try carving out a few minutes each day before bed where you share with your partner what you appreciate about him and why.