“I believe that when a woman is given the chance to come to the defense of another woman, that is an opportunity that she should take in behalf of not only that woman; but in behalf of herself and all other women, everywhere. Men don't have low opinions of women because women are sluts and whores; but men have low opinions of women because they see how women compete with one another, pull one another down in order to rise above and backbite one another endlessly. There are men who have low opinions of women because of how women treat other women. They see that and they think, "What kind of a species can do that to their own species?" So if you really want the guy, why not get him by showing him what a true friend you are to your girlfriends? Or by showing him how happy you are for the good fortune of another woman and how much you admire her? And if he doesn't appreciate that then he doesn't deserve you! I know we've got a long, long way to go before we change the way our gender treats one another; but it's got to start somewhere and I suggest we start right now.”
True to the Twin archetype of your sign, there is another side to you that people don’t often see. You would prefer to not be single. You are at your best when you are in a dynamic, yet stable relationship. You prefer a relationship that is caring and tender, and even romantic – but never boring. Your ideal partner will give you plenty of freedom to socialize, exchange ideas, and be yourself while at the same time being a reliable and tested foundation of strength for you. Your partner must be intelligent, interesting, social, and like to talk. You also need someone to be there for you unconditionally when you feel the need to withdraw and be nurtured.
"The penis-vagina model of sex comes with pressures, such as having an orgasm at the same time or the idea that an orgasm should happen with penetration. With these strict expectations come a pressure on performance that ultimately leads many to feel a sense of failure and frustration. Instead, try to expand your concept of sex to include anything that involves close, intimate connection with your partner, such as sensual massages, taking a nice shower or bath together, reading an erotic story together, playing with some fun toys… the possibilities are endless. And if orgasm happens, great, and if not, that's OK too. When you expand your definition of sex and lower the pressure on orgasm and penetration, the anxiety around performance dissipates and your satisfaction can escalate."
I think the 13th Century Persian Poet Rumi sums up love so eloquently. He wrote: ‘Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.’ The way I interpret this that when it comes to love, you can’t give or receive love unless you love and respect yourself. If you feel you are worthy of love, then you can fully love. It sounds so simple, and yet we know how hard loving ourselves can be. But I’ve seen miracles happen when people work at this... everything from relationships, career, raising kids, running a home, becomes more joyous. And yet the only thing that’s changed is the relationship you have with yourself.
Write down an actual list of what you need out of a relationship and whether those needs are being met. Rowena, 69, found the list helped her. "When I met Graham and decided to get involved with him, I sat down with a piece of paper and I wrote pros and cons. I was in my 30s at that point, and I said 'Hmm, you know, this is what I want.' And this guy had those qualities — many more good ones than bad ones.
Geminis are also known as the Twins and often find relationships that fulfill only some of their needs. They think it is impossible for any one person to meet all their needs, and at times feel as though they are two people residing in the same body. Unfortunately, these relationships tend not to last. Geminis eventually feel the gaping hole where the put-aside needs are not being fulfilled. Some Geminis may go as far as filling that hole with another person who will meet those unmet, unexpressed needs – even if they didn’t plan it. Often, the result is two bad relationships, not one good one.
I have never felt like I missed out on a marriage or a child. I decided to make a life out of taking care of other people’s children — they are all my children. And my family has so many children who love me all the same. The life that I had growing up was too tough for me. I grew up deprived and I definitely did not want that for a child. I never wanted to bring a child onto this earth unless I could support that child and give it everything that it wanted.
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Your man wants to know you appreciate him for who he is and what he brings to the relationship. If you love him, make sure he knows. Keep in mind Dr. John Gottman’s 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interchanges. For every one negative remark you make, try to think of five positive things to say, to counteract the negative effects of a critical word. Try carving out a few minutes each day before bed where you share with your partner what you appreciate about him and why.