“I believe that when a woman is given the chance to come to the defense of another woman, that is an opportunity that she should take in behalf of not only that woman; but in behalf of herself and all other women, everywhere. Men don't have low opinions of women because women are sluts and whores; but men have low opinions of women because they see how women compete with one another, pull one another down in order to rise above and backbite one another endlessly. There are men who have low opinions of women because of how women treat other women. They see that and they think, "What kind of a species can do that to their own species?" So if you really want the guy, why not get him by showing him what a true friend you are to your girlfriends? Or by showing him how happy you are for the good fortune of another woman and how much you admire her? And if he doesn't appreciate that then he doesn't deserve you! I know we've got a long, long way to go before we change the way our gender treats one another; but it's got to start somewhere and I suggest we start right now.”
I think one of the most powerful things about women is our intuition. I can't remember a time that I've had a true gut check (as I call it) lead me the wrong way. I think we are taught to brush intuition off as being overly sensitive but I say trust it. I trust my gut to guide my professional choices, to know when something works or just doesn't, and I use my gut in my personal life to be the same sort of emotional barometer.
Philosopher and psychologist Viktor Frankl said that when you know your ‘why’, you can endure any ‘how’. Know your why. Why are you in a relationship with your partner? Your answer will be the light that guides you. If you can’t answer this question clearly, maybe it’s time to re-evaluate your relationship. Take it to a level deeper, ‘because I love him/her’ is not sufficient, why do you love them?
One reason that you may not even be aware of is an issue called receptive desire, Mintz says. "As a woman ages and the relationship goes on, [many] stop being spontaneously horny," she explains. "A lot of men and women don't know this, so they wait to be [turned on] to have sex...But you can have sex to get [turned on], rather than wait to be [turned on] to have sex."
My first love was way older than me. About 17 years older! He was in the army, the regiment. My brother was also in the service — when I went to visit him, I met this guy. It didn’t last — we just dated for a short time and that was it. But he was quite nice to me. Being older, he knew how to treat a woman. I was about 25 and we would go the movies and stuff like that. You see, I didn’t quite understand what love was, because growing up, we didn’t have a lot of love in our household. My grandmother, who raised me, had very old school practices.
Reminder yourself that being in a new relationship is a time of discovery and curiosity (and a lot is going to be new all at once). "To alleviate pressure, remind yourself to stay present and open," says Syrtash. And this goes for being true to yourself and trusting your gut instinct. It doesn't matter if someone is perfect on paper if they end up not being the right person for you.
"Don't take your love for granted. Love is like a plant, it needs to be nurtured so it will continue to grow. Without water and sunlight, it will die. This is why it is so important to make time for things like date night, whether it is once a week or once a month. The key is to continue to make the other one feel special and loved — to enjoy each other's company and have fun."
Taurus and the Virgo man share a predictable, down-to-earth nature and generally tranquil disposition. However, the sexual side of this relationship can be difficult to foster. If Taurus can put up with Virgo’s tendency towards obsessive perfectionism, this pair can enjoy a long life together. For the Taurus woman committed to making this match work, a psychic is a good source of love advice.
The Bull and the Capricorn man share many common goals, although their motivation often comes from different sources. Romantic bliss is not unheard of for this pair but they have some obstacles to overcome. Emotionally, the Goat is too cold and detached for the Taurus woman. However, with the help of a psychic, this pair can move past their problems and create a satisfying life together.
Change it up. If you continue to respond in the way that's brought you pain and unhappiness in the past, you can't expect a different result this time. Just one little shift can make a big difference. If you usually jump right in to defend yourself before your partner is finished speaking, hold off for a few moments. You'll be surprised at how such a small shift in tempo can change the whole tone of an argument.
"The number one thing I have learned about love is that it is a trade and a social exchange, not just a feeling. Loving relationships are a process by which we get our needs met and meet the needs of our partners too. When that exchange is mutually satisfying, then good feelings continue to flow. When it is not, then things turn sour, and the relationship ends. That is why it is important to pay attention to what you and your partner actually do for each other as expressions of love... not just how you feel about each other in the moment."
That's when it can be helpful for him to hear compliments both in and out of the bedroom. Mintz suggests starting outside the bedroom, when you can have what she calls a "kitchen table sex talk" — AKA a lower-stakes time to discuss things that are bothering you in the bedroom without having to be "in the moment" of, well, having sex. That's when your partner can talk about what pressures he's feeling, or what he's self-conscious about. Then, you can boost his confidence.
So what's a woman to do? First, understand that your guy's hasty retreat post-sex may be because he doesn't understand how much he craves a connection with you. Then, it's time for another kitchen table sex talk, Mintz says. "If he's been jumping in the shower right after sex for the last 10 years, he's going to be really taken off guard if, the next time he goes into the shower, you all of a sudden say it upsets you," she explains. "Instead, set aside a time to talk when the situation has passed."
This particular relationship advice is for women exclusively. Big mistake women make is thinking that their man can read their thoughts and should “just know” when they are angry, hungry, tired or upset about something that happened at work. Even the most intuitive man cannot know what’s inside your head. Use your communication skills to express your feelings. It will make everything easier and you won’t end up harboring resentment because your man had no idea you wanted him to pick up pasta for dinner instead of pizza.
"It's a turnoff for me when a girl pretends to like something just because I like it. 'You like the Knicks? Weird, I love the Knicks! Who's that tall one again? Who are you and what are your interests? If we disagree about stuff, let's have fun disagreeing about it and if any of it winds up being too important, then, well, it won't work out and that's fine." Miles P.