Regardless of the perspective, science is generally pretty hard on romantic love, whether it is seen as a “goal oriented motivation state”, an “illusion”, a fantasy projection, or just really dramatic lust. Either way, it is normal for romantic love to end (slowly or abruptly) when the illusions and projections are forced to change as we learn more about the actual human being in the relationship with us (“oh he/she isn’t a god/goddess after all!”), or the intensity of the drive naturally subsides.
Spinning his computer around, he invites me to try his Soul mate Calculator, an app he wrote to convince people that they need his SocialGrid technology. A page full of pulldown menus and checkboxes boots up: The calculator uses a simple script to crunch US census figures on age, gender, and geographic location to estimate how many people I'll have to meet before I find my soul mate. To fill the thing out I need to decide what my potential mate's ethnicity should be, and whether I want him or her to be in the top 10 percent of people in terms of facial attractiveness, optimism, or musical talent. Also, how compassionate do I want my soul mate to be? Top 50 percent? Top 1 percent?
Whatever aesthetic intention may come into play as well, the main issue of the paratext is not to “look nice” around the text but rather to ensure for the text a destiny consistent with the author’s purpose. To this end, the paratext provides a kind of canal lock between the ideal and relatively immutable identity of the text and the empirical (sociohistorical) reality of the text’s public…the lock permitting the two to remain “level”. (407-408)
The plan: Find someone who’s achieved what you want who shouldn’t have been able to do it. One of Tony’s major role models for how to master money is Sir John Templeton. He started with nothing and decided to save 50% of every dollar he earned. Since he started this practice young, it quickly became a streamlined habit. His life also showed Tony that the best time to make money – whether through investments, real estate or in business – are during pessimistic times. You can use this method in the pursuit of happiness, too. Think of someone you admire who is wildly happy. What mindsets or beliefs do they follow that allows them to be happy?
Unfortunately, your brain cannot maintain this level of chemical production indefinitely. The hormones decrease and your brain chemistry gradually returns to normal. Once you lose this intense state of passion, or chemically-boosted love, you crave it again. When this happens, some people mistakenly believe that “love” has been lost and then turn away from their partners in search of a new partner who can provide this chemically-induced feeling of exuberance. But relationships progresses in stages.
Code Romantic uses a connection to the internet in order to deliver anonymous telemetry data. We use this data to make the puzzles better. There are elements of Code Romantic that are used to track its potential effectiveness as an educational tool; no identifiable information of our users is collected or saved. There are no advertisements in Code Romantic.
I’m not sure why Mai decided to help me that day. Curiosity? Boredom? The hope that I would pass her some cash? (Which, of course, I did.) But regardless of her motive, she did agree. Soon enough, after a steep march over a nearby hillside, we arrived at Mai’s stone house, which was tiny, soot-darkened, lit only by a few small windows, and nestled in one of the prettiest river valleys you could ever imagine. Mai led me inside and introduced me around to a group of women, all of them weaving, cooking, or cleaning. Of all the women, it was Mai’s grandmother whom I found most immediately intriguing. She was the laughingest, happiest, four-foot-tall toothless granny I’d ever seen in my life. What’s more, she thought me hilarious. Every single thing about me seemed to crack her up beyond measure. She put a tall Hmong hat on my head, pointed at me, and laughed. She stuck a tiny Hmong baby into my arms, pointed at me, and laughed. She draped me in a gorgeous Hmong textile, pointed at me, and laughed.
Not only is it mentally stimulating (not to mention fun), but challenging yourself to learn a new skill can lead to greater happiness, experts say. That’s thanks to the feelings of accomplishment and self-confidence that often come along with gaining new expertise. Consider this your cue to sign up for those French lessons you’ve always wanted to take, or pick up the ukulele—choose something that genuinely interests you, and run with it!